Last week I noticed a rather plump-looking lady rimming a glass with her big sausage finger, whilst intermittently and seductively glancing at me. She was also twirling her long blonde hair with the index finger of her other hand. So I did what any extremely intoxicated man would do. I brought that chunky honey home and fell asleep on her back moments before intercourse. This experience opened my eyes to a whole new hidden underlying world. It conjured up the notion in me that people can be read and understood simply by their body language. So, after some quick research and a lot of unscientific induction, I have arrived at this...4 ways to utilize body language in the work place.
In body language terms, the word mirroring basically means adopting the identical gestures and postures of the person with whom you are speaking. This copying is a means by which one person “tells” the other that he is in agreement with his ideas and attitudes. This knowledge can be useful in the workplace. For example, if an employer wishes to develop an immediate rapport and create a relaxed atmosphere with an employee, he need only copy the employee’s posture to achieve this. Similarly, an up and coming employee may be seen copying his boss’ gestures in an attempt to show agreement. Using this knowledge it is possible to influence and important face to face encounter and also to create an amiable environment.
According to psychologists, body language experts, and philosophers, the eyes are the windows to the soul. That is, the eyes can give us important insights into the thoughts of others. In given light conditions, the pupils will dilate and contract as the person’s attitude and mood change from positive to negative or vice versa. When someone becomes excited, the pupils can dilate up to four times their normal size. Conversely, an angry or negative mood causes the pupils to contract. These are some of the reasons why expert poker players wear dark glasses during play. In tests conducted on these experts, it was shown that fewer games were won by experts when their opponents won dark glasses. They are unconsciously able to pick up on subtle pupil movement which influences their betting, calling and bluffing decisions. So, to sum up, look a person in the pupil to gain an insight into their thoughts.
Depending on the situation you find yourself in, you may want to adopt a particular type of gaze to help you gain an advantage. In important business meetings where you want to keep a stern, no-nonsense environment, you should adopt the “business gaze.” This gaze is directed towards the middle of the eyes and the forehead. Imagine a triangle connecting the two eyes and lower part of the forehead. By directing your gaze at this area you will create a serious atmosphere, and the other person will sense that you mean business. Provided your gaze does not drop below eye level, you will be able to maintain control over the interaction.
You can certainly tell a lot by a person’s handshake. You can use different techniques to your advantage in business settings. Whether you want to take control of an interaction or give control away, you can do this by adopting a particular type of handshake. For example dominance is transmitted by turning your hand so that your palm faces down in the hand shake. Your palm need not be facing the floor directly, but should be facing downwards in relation to the other persons palm. This tells him your wish to take control of the situation. Studies of senior management executives have shown that nearly 90% of executives not only initiated the handshake but also used this position. So yeah, if you want to take control of a situation, this type of handshake should do so.
Hope this helps, and have fun. I’ll have some more body language tips next week! Subscribe now.
P.S. - I don't plan on calling on the chunky honey again.
This is a guest post by Chris O'Hara.